Big Ears

Photo by Towfiqu Barbhuiya

What’s on my mind?

They say ears and noses never stop growing. It feels true when I notice certain politicians on TV, the close-up portrait of my dad at my wedding, or that weird archaeologist on YouTube. And then, of course, there’s that old lady in the mirror every morning, me. Should I tuck my hair behind my giant sound catchers, or let them breathe? Lately, I’ve found myself a bit self-conscious.

A quick Google search revealed that this ear-nugget of knowledge isn’t true after all. Aging and gravity are the real culprits, both relentless, both unavoidable. So what looks like Dumbo ears on grandma is actually just gravity winning, or so I read.

I never noticed I had funky ears until my mother pointed it out. She said they stuck out too far but reassured me that a bit of plastic surgery, a tuck here, a nip there, could easily fix my flappers. I was in sixth grade, for God’s sake! She also recommended contact lenses, just to round out the improvements.

In high school, seniors would “will” certain items to juniors at a school assembly. I was blindsided when a senior girl willed me her well-padded backside; apparently, mine was as flat as plywood, and everyone knew except me. That was 46 years ago, and it still stings.

Today, I’m letting go of old opinions about my ears and backside. It feels like a big day. From now on, I’ll treat people like me, those affected by aging, with a little more kindness. We can’t change gravity unless we colonize the moon, and I doubt that’s happening in our lifetime.